Few days ago , i heard from my friend that he had broken up with his girlfriend just few weeks ago . As a friend , i asked him the reason and he just gave me a sentence , that is " because we have the same surname " . When i heard that , there was something came out from my mind . Why we can't marry with a person who has same surname with us ? And then , i started to think about this . At last , i got some opinion on it . Let me tell you about what i had figured out .
In my opinion , i think there is normal thing for us to marry a person who has same surname name with us . There are some points that support my view .
First at all , let me tell you about the origin of our surname . Long time ago , there was no such thing called " surname " , what they had is just name only . However , i don't know until what time , they started to create what we called " surname " now . Some of the " surnames " get the ideal from the name of place . For example , During the period of three kingdom ( the End of Dynasty of HAN ) , the people who live in the kingdom of Wu started to use " Wu " ( the mandarin word is Ng ) as their surname . This shows that there maybe no close relationship among the persons who have the same surname . They just used the same surname only . Therefore , we still have the change to marry with the person that has same surname with us .
If u still not agree what i said just now , i still tell u another point , that is the life of our early ancestors . Long time ago , there was no much peoples that live in this world . Then , how they could make sure their generation could last forever ? What they done during that period was they reproduced within their family members . Then , they had done what we thought that is " Wrong " for now long time ago . So , when we say that we can't marry with the person who has same surname , this means we had accepted that our ancestors had done the " Wrong " thing . If our ancestors had done " Wrong " thing , then what is the value of us ? Are we still called as Human ? Or we just the product of our ancestors' " Wrong " thing ? This i can't give you a " Right " answer because i still can't differentiate what is " Wrong " and " Right " . I let u to decide it .................
On the other hand , i still have one point to support my view , that the behavior or animal . Generally , we knew that we , human are one of the members in a Family call Animal . In the world of animal , they usually reproduce with their family member . This is because in the animal world , there is little opportunity for you or your partner to has the time to reproduce . They may need to pay attention on their predator or the fertilization period of the female organism is short . This may decreases the change for them to reproduce . So , they need to reproduce within their family members . That means when we say that we can't marry with the person who has same surname , this shows that we don't accept us as an animal . If we are not animal , then what is us ? Alien ? I give you some time to think about it .
When i thought until this stage , there is a question mark appear in my mind , that is what is " Right " and what is " Wrong " . In my opinion , actually what we think that is " Right " is the thing that our ancestor feel that it is acceptable for them . So , when we done the " Right " thing , that means we have done the thing that is accepted by your ancestors only . We can't say that we are " Right " . If you still can't understand it , let me explain to you in the other way . For example , you act as your ancestor , you feel that every boy in your family must marry before they are 25 year olds . So , you set it as your family's rule . Day after day , this rule will become the " Right " thing in the your family , but in the other people's view , this will be the "Wrong " rule . However , as the generation of your family need to accept it as the " Right " thing to do because you were their ancestor of them . They need to follow what you said in order to pay respect to you . Then , what is the value of " Right " and the value of " Wrong "? Can you tell me ???????????????
I think that this is all about what i want to say for this time . However , this all is my opinion only . You may not agree what i said here , but i hope that you can give out your view . In conclusion , i feel that there is no big deal when we marry with the person who has same surname with us if we go to check about our DNA before we go to marry . And other thing is i feel that there is no such thing called " Right thing " or " Wrong thing " in the world , what we have in this world is the thing that the world can accept it only . So , How about u ????????
3 comments:
Using the concept that Human is Animal. I love that because there are many opinions that i thought using the same theory. I don't there are many people care about these so called "right" things. That why people who still follow these rules are so strict about obeying rules. I think perhaps there is other reasons beside surname thing for your friend. Well, just saying my opinion.
Wait.
Your friend's reason is not a good one.
When he first started the relationship, didn't he know the girl's name? ... I'm sure he did. So why did he start anyway?
Hey. I found this letter online.... thought it was relevant.
Clem,
Chinese learned empirically that marriage between close relatives can give
rise to defective births. That is the origin of this taboo. Now it is quite
clear from genetics that the inheritance of recessive bad genes can be
statistically compensated by marrying someone further from the family tree
that has a dominant healthy gene. The scanty population of Mongolians,
Inuits forces them to acquire new traits from other gene pools. Thus, they
have the custom of offering the wife to a foreign stranger. It sounds weird
but surprisingly genetically correct. It is also true that interracial
marriages often result in intelligent and handsom/beautiful offsprings.
Back to your question, it should be alright these days to have marriages of
the same surname, as long as they are not related within three generations.
That is there has been 'dilution' with other gene pools. In fact marriage
between cousins of different surnames are equal taboos in Chinese custom, by
the same observation and reasoning.
Hakka and non-Hakka by the same surname could be relatives way back, south
or north. Those who did not migrate are still related. However, since Tang
emperors offer the surname Lee(Li) to many courtiers and generals of major
contribution, many Lee(Li)'s were not from the same gene pool.
SL Lee
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